Ben 10’s Adventures of Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie/Transcript

Opening
Harold Hutchins: Dreamworks Animation presents… In association with…

George & Harold: Tree House Comix, Inc.!

George Beard: Inc., Inc., Inc.

George: (from off-screen) All right, okay. So. A long, long, long, long time ago… in a galaxy far, faraway… there was a planet called Underpanty world.

Harold: (from o.s.) Oh, wait, wait, wait. Okay, go.

George: That’s perfect. Okay. Underpanty world was a peaceful planet where everybody wore only underwear. Until it started to blow up for some reason.

Big Daddy Long John: Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh.

Space Baby: Da-da.

George: Meanwhile, the leaders of Underpanty world, Big Daddy Long John and his wife, Princess Pantyhose saved their baby by stretching his underwear really far and then they shot him into space.

Big Daddy Long John: Godspeed, little Underpants.

Space Baby: Whee!

George: And then he crashed on Earth, where he was raised by some nice fi… Dolphins?

Harold: Yeah, dolphins. Just go with it.

George: Okay, fine.

Space Baby: Goo-goo, gah-gah. Tra-la-la-la-la-Ia.

George: But the space baby grew up fast.

Boy 1: Look! Up in the sky! It’s a bird!

Girl: It’s a plane!

Boy 2: It’s an egg salad sandwich!

Egg Salad Sandwich: And guess what? I’m rotten!

Captain Underpants: Faster than a speeding waistband. More powerful than boxer shorts.

Kids: Yay!

Egg Salad Sandwich: You’ll never catch me, Captain Underpants! Owie!

Captain Underpants: Able to leap tall buildings without getting a wedgie.

Policeman: Hey, all right. Good for you, pal. Now put on some clothes, you weirdo.

Captain Underpants: No way! I fight for truth, justice, and all that is pre-shrunk and cottony! For I am…

Harold: Captain Underpants! The origin issue.

George: It’s so good. We should’ve done an origin issue ages ago.

Harold: Yeah, like, first.

George: You know, I’m not sure about the dolphins, though.

Harold: Yeah, I know. It’s just… I didn’t know if it was the thing where it’s, like, good weird or bad weird. Like, is it something… The origin issue!

Krupp: I’ve told you two a thousand times not to draw these idiotic comics!

George: Freeze! Hey, everybody! Wait one second. Hi. I’m George Beard. And this is my best friend, Harold Hutchins.

Harold: Hey. Aw, man.

George: It’s okay. We got more ideas. See, Harold loves to draw and I love to tell stories. And this old guy looking angry right here… well, this is the worst principal in the world… Mr. Krupp.

Harold: Mean old Mr. Krupp. Hates anything fun. Like comic books… recess… Christmas.

Santa: Ho, ho, whoa!

Harold: Even kittens!

George: Oh, my goodness. Did that really happen?

Harold: Uh, no, not technically. But it might as well have! I’m sorry. I--I’m still mad about the comic.

George: Yeah, me too. And unfreeze.

Krupp: we're going to my office… NOW!

George: What is happening right now?

Harold: I don’t know.

George: Do you think he fell asleep with his eyes open?

Harold: Maybe. Let’s try and leave and see what happens.

Door voice: Door lock activated.

George: Wow. That’s an expensive door.